Wednesday, June 10, 2009

On the Edge

Breath in Breath out

Breath in and Breath out

What have I done

What could have cause it

How did I end up here

How did I go from the life of a millionaire

With endless resources and power

To cleaning out garbage cans on 5th Ave

Fast cars good food to holes in shoes and rotation

Having the love of my to losing her in a blink of an eye

From holding her one day to rubbing her hand next to the hospital

The warmth of her lying on my chest to the cold isolated casket

I still have money but why do I choose to live this way

What has but me on the edge of ending my life

As walking this fine line of life and death

What has keep me in this endless state of mind

What gives me hope to continue on

Buy flowers and put it at her feet and go on with the day

Alcohol and drugs won’t be able to fill the void I feel

From the kiss of her lips I miss

The smile when I wake up in the morning

The smell I come from the bathroom

The dance of elegant that we have had in the morning air

What has put me on this edge

I sit there under the trees thinking what put me here on this edge

It has been a year since I seen her

I feel her when I am asleep

I hear her in my ear

I smell her still on my clothes

Each breeze that comes over my face warms my heart

Will I ever come out of the grievance

Return to the place we live final after a year as if we left it

Clean up and put on the necklace that reminds me of you

Return to the grave super glue it to your grave

Now I need to return back to the life that I have created for us

Because I know in this heart where you lie forever

That you would not want me on the edge of life

Keeping me from walking this fine line of life and death

And I have chosen life or death

Happiness over turmoil

Light then darkness

And I see the life at the end of the tunnel

And that light is and always will be you


911

Someone call 911

I have been shot

Hello Operation

Yes how may I help you

Yes I have been shot

Where

In a place where the home is

A place where emotions for someone else live and grow into something great

I have been shot and I don’t know if I can recover from this right now

I feel like I am dying

Hold on sir help is on the way

Help?

How can you help admen something that has been broken into something that can’t be recognize

Is there a crime to take away those feelings and leaving me like this

To leave me in this state

To put me on this edge of life

Where I am dying of not loving you

Sir what are you suffering from

Operator I am suffering from a broken heart and I cause it

Can you help me with that

Sir we only help with emergencies

Well that is an emergency in its self

Then you can’t help everyone